[B] I'm going to be a what? (HYB & Sacred Grove) (gaia transfer)

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Lirilei
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[B] I'm going to be a what? (HYB & Sacred Grove) (gaia transfer)

Post by Lirilei »

Hold hadn't ever stopped to think about this whole fatherhood thing. If you'd asked him about it, he'd have hemmed and hawed and stalled, and likely in the end snorted or shrugged in a 'Whatever' sort of manner. He really wasn't the type to make a decision right off the bat without some long drawn out thought, and hoof dragging after all.

So to get the news from Tightly Curled that he was going to be a father, that was a staggering thing, and the normally composed buck was a bundle of nerves. Half excited, half full of dread, and completely at a loss on how he felt about all this, (was he happy? He didn't know. He thought maybe he was but... maybe not? He couldn't pin down those emotions!)

Currently, he was off doing searching. Soul searching to be sure, but searching none the less, though as he walked things like 'I bet she'd like some of those berries' crept into his mind, and he made half a mental note to take something back to her, for the moment, he was trying to actually make a decision on things, though he didn't much like the idea of having to pin down a solid decision on things. He sighed and shook his head as he walked a little, realizing it was the sudden (surprise) knowledge that he was going to be a father that had him so unsettled, more than the idea of being a father. He groaned a little as he continued to walk. This is okay. This is fine. This is GOOD. Right?



The struggle of parenthood had always been a close one to the Kiokote's heart, but she always found a sort of intrigue that there were those that never thought of it until it happened.

Ascent could practically taste his consternation on the air, and failing that, she could see the trouble on his brow, just as surely as she could see the light that pegged him as an expecting parent. "It is not the end of your days," she offered as she heard the moan, coming up to his side from behind, her glowing eyes soft and amused. "I promise. It is, perhaps, the start of something new, though."
The sudden voice by him startled him he'd been so lost in thought he'd not realized there was anyone else around. His tail flicked a little as he turned to the Kiokote and gave a rueful smile.

"No, I suppose its not. I am just....undecided on how to feel about this. I never planned to be a father. Then again I never planned to not be one either. It wasn't a decision I'd made, either way. Now, it's been made for me and...." he trailed off with another sigh. It felt stupid to be so at odds like this, over what was to most a happy occasion. He knew he should be happy, maybe a little excitedly nervous. Not this... slight feeling of dread... and not even because he was going to be a father, but because he was undecided on if he'd ever wanted to be. It was his own fault. He just needed to come to terms with the idea of fatherhood, and how it applied to him.

He could be happy, if he let himself.

"I know though....that its my own doing. If I didn't want kids, I shouldn't have....y'know. I'll admit, I didn't stop to think about how things would go if this situation came up. I wasn't prepared. I think that's my biggest problem. I was caught off guard."
"The MotherFather blesses your union," the Kiokote offered with a gentle amusement. "You needn't fear." Ascent tossed her auburn mane, humming a brief and faint tune. "In my experience, your kin don't remain as parents. It's unique that you're even thinking about it and taking responsibility -- I think, dear one, that makes you a much better father than you realize."

She came around to pause in front of him, her gaze gentle, her expression knowing. "I've come to share with you the touch of the MotherFather. If you desire...you can ask for something for your children. And if you choose not to...none will be the wiser."

He didn't have to be a father, but then again, he didn't have to care. But he did. And that said much more than she ever could.
There was a surprised note from him at those words, and he felt better about things then. Maybe that was the issue, he was worried about how good a father he'd be to young ones...and now, well he felt less unsure, and worried about things. Maybe this fatherhood thing wouldn't be so bad.

He gave a thoughtful nod at the whole asking for something for his children, still not fully aware of who, or what he was talking to. He just thought it was a wise Kiokote who happened to be in the right place at the right time, to help calm him.

"I don't really know what I could ask for my children... except...well..." he hesitated a moment, and there a tentative. "....maybe that they can reach a decision with less drawn out thought, and worry than I do. Not rash but...." he trailed off, not sure if he was making sense now.
Pale eyes turned over the handsome blue buck, smiling softly as she saw him give it consideration, feeling that perhaps, she had won him over. Indeed, he seemed to come around to the idea, even if it didn't seem he entirely understood her presence or purpose.

Sometimes, that was for the best.

"A worthy askance." Ascent closed her eyes for a moment, and when she opened them again, the flowers on her mane and pelt blossomed. "Your children will be considerate in all things, but decisive; they will know their way, their judgment unclouded. Uncertainty shan't plague them in matters of the heart."

The Kiokote smiled once again. "And with you as their father, they will so be guided. The MotherFather wills it so."
"I'm glad that made sense." he gave a self conscious laugh as he said that, having indeed thought it was more rambling nonsense, than actually something the other would be able to understand with ease.

There was a surprised noise as the flowers seemed to blossom suddenly and he shook his head slightly, wondering if he were imagining things, but no, he wasn't. Still his attention was captured by her words, a relieved sort of sigh from him. While he might not know who she was, or what he was there for it didn't matter. Her words were still a soothing balm on the nervous bucks mind, and he relaxed a little.

"Thank you."
"Perfect sense," she assured the buck, "especially given how concerned you are. You're going to do great; believe in yourself!" Ascent may have been the Swamp's cheerleader, but she truly believed it. He was accepting the role he wanted to play in the lives of his future children, and that was a beautiful thing.

Stepping to the side, she cast him another smile. "Be brave, and be proud, dear one. And perhaps, if the MotherFather wills it -- we will meet again." The Kiokote bowed her head and shimmered out of existence like motes of sunlight, a swan in her place. Lifting blossom-laden wings, she took to the sky and left the buck to tend to his thoughts -- and to bring the mother-to-be some of those berries.
A sense of relief washed over him knowing he had made sense in his tentative rambling. That and her words of encouragement did much to bolster him.

He gave a started note seeing the swan suddenly in place of the doe he'd been speaking with, and he realized in that moment just what she was, and he breathed a soft note. "Wow...."

Watching the swan until he could no longer see it, he breathed a sigh, a more relaxed one to be sure and returned to picking berries feeling a lot better about this whole thing than he had when he set out.
word count: 1403
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